“Just write what you experienced”, said my editor, as he handed me my topic for the week. The topic being a narrative of the first solo trip I had recently taken. How was I supposed express the plethora of emotions that I had felt in mere words? Yet express them I did.

     My journey began not 10 days ago but months ago. I had finally been able to save up for my trip. “Earn what you wish to spend”, my father had said when I had mentioned the idea. When I finally had enough money, my parents begrudgingly allowed me to plan my dream trip. I had decided that I would visit Pondicherry. I booked the tickets and accommodations, not the luxurious ones by parents could afford but good enough. Once booked the trip took a backseat in my mind, overshadowed by the stress of work and exams.

     And suddenly out of nowhere, the day of my travel arrived. How the past 3 months had passed I did know. I was packed and all set to go. My cab was at the door. Before bidding me goodbye, my mother who still wasn’t very happy with the trip asked me one question “Why do you even want to do this?” Unable to answer, I mumbled a goodbye and left. The entire duration of my journey I spent pondering over this question. As we neared my destination, both exhilaration and nervousness took over me and the question was forgotten.

      The next 4 days, to be honest, were mad. I made friends with complete strangers, bargained with rickshaw wallas in broken Tamil, spent hours on the beach, went skydiving for the first time my life. It wasn’t until my last evening in Pondicherry, that the question came back. Only now I had an answer. As I sat the all alone sipping coffee, it hit me. The purpose of my trip was to fight. To fight that fear of loneliness that I have harbored my entire life. I had known this for some time, I believe. But as I fought my fear, realized that I was alone, but not lonely, the answer came to me. A lost traveler was now home. She had found her purpose.

Anushka Naik